Right Now

I am blogging, figuring a way to get out of cooking dinner and am quietly amazed that the kids are so anxious for our annual St. Patties Day traditions.

My son is playing Runescape during his break from writing yet another book report (Daniel Boone biography: pick five things important to the character, write a paragraph about each of them and bring in an example of each item - only two can be pictures)

My girlie is making St. Patrick's Day decorations with entirely too much glue and glitter but she is happy and quiet and will enjoy using my little dustbuster type thing to suck up the mess.

My husband is FINALLY making the daughter's bed. It's going to be a captain's bed (I think) with four large and two small drawers underneath Plus a cabinet door that will access a narrow space behind the drawers. I figure I'll put the wrapping supplies back there. With an 1100 square foot house storage options must be creative. Every bed we saw in the stores was just not quite right...drawers not deep enough, shoddy construction, ugly finish, four drawers when she really needs six...did I mention she shares her closet with some of our stuff (we have no closet) and the vacuum? She needs six drawers. He's using maple, which he likes to work with and I like to look at.

It's snowing here today...at least it's supposed to. Now it's just windy flurries, barely accumulating. The kids haven't had a snow day all year so today I let the boy stay home (in all fairness he was coughing and looked kind of tired??) and the girlie should be leaving in fifteen minutes...not sure what's happening there. She's missed alot of school recently and she should go but it's kindergarten. And somehow the house just feels better with her in it.

The pup has cancer.

I wish I knew more but

A. We got the newer vet, the one the practice is NOT named after. I don't really like her. She talks way too fast, seems to always be rushed or to have some other very important thing she needs to be doing during the brief moment she spends talking to you. After his surgery she didn't even come out to give us any post op directions, I had questions and the office girl had to run and get her. And even then she came out answered half of it and left while I glanced down at my dog.

B. My husband answered the phone. At best he's only good for being able to relay about half of the information he's heard. But speaking with this vet? Probably a quarter. He said there were alot of numbers/test results etc. She did tell him that they got the whole thing and he said she started talking about some treatment options then told him we'd discuss it on Tuesday when he goes to get his stitches out.

A few nights ago he was walking around and doing this cry/whine/howl thing. I thought he was sick, maybe he'd gotten into something outside or whatever. So he'd whine, I let him out. Ten minutes later he'd bark and I'd let him in. This went on until 1:30 a.m. when my husband took over. Come to find out he was going outside and just standing on the deck or on the lawn next to the deck. Then he'd come to the door and bark to come in.

My diagnosis? Can'tclimbthestairswiththisstupidcollaronand
Iwanttosleeponyourbedroomflooritis.

He wasn't ill. He didn't need to go out. He wasn't even lonely - I was awake and in the living room with him until 1:30 and my husband got out of bed and slept downstairs after that. The dog whined off and on for seven hours because he was bummed out.

Pretty much what I'll be doing today. But quietly.

And blah blah blah with more hockey

So first I'll apologize because well, enough with the hockey already.

But it's the busiest time of the season. Playoffs, extra ice time, tryouts and now somehow it has come to pass that our 1000 square foot home is the place to be on the weekends. Got a few hours to kill between practices? You'll find six boys in our living room in the midst of a knee hockey tournament and three dads and a mom or two in the kitchen with me whipping up grilled cheese and something or other I either pull out of the freezer or out of the stuff people, very thoughtfully, stop and pick up. No plans on Wednesday afternoon (this would be the prison guard/third shift working coach and my waiting to go back to work husband)? Give us a call, we can hang out. Do our early evening practices leave you feeling like you've got nowhere to really go but still want to have some pizza/soup/chili/beer? Swing on by.

The tryouts did go well. The boy made the B team easily and was what we call "on the bubble" for the A. Meaning, while he didn't make the As, he's one of three kids who will be evaluated again in the fall. They'll be checking out more than three kids this fall but not too many more and with two open spots left on the team for just this occasion, well, he's still got a shot.

Either way, proud of the kid.

But. Coach called. He told my husband to put in his application to coach the B team. This year's coach was still skating the kids around cones in February, not practicing plays...just a mess. He says they're looking to change up the coach and that my dear darling betrothed should apply - he'd be a good fit.

Great news?

Sort of. In the next breath he tells my husband that in the fall he'll be given a list of five or so names of kids that could fill those two spots. And if the boy is on the list? He'll take him and my husband will be coaching a team that his son doesn't play for. Maybe not a huge deal in some sports but in a 32 week season it's a big commitment. Especially if it means missing his games or a tournament. Last year's coach has already put in an application and no one else has stepped up...so it could be a crummy coach if the husband doesn't apply. Not a recipe for a fun year.

Our other concern is that my boy will get automatically taken off the list if his dad is coaching another team. Thinking that they're doing us a favor, maybe. Not sure how it would work at this point. Holding him back, while it wouldn't kill him, isn't really the compromise we want to make.

The husband & the coach are going to hang out tomorrow afternoon and discuss the options.

Why can't it ever be easy?

Monday Meme

I saw this over at Sneeky's and Cady's and thought, oh hey, I freaking love housework. Perfect.


aprons - y/n? No. And I need one. I'm messy when I cook but I do clean as I go.
baking - Meh. Not my thing.
clothesline - y/n? I've wanted one for a few years now...maybe this summer.
donuts - ever made them? No. And probably never will.
everyday - one homemaking thing you do everyday? Make the beds.
freezer - do you have a separate deep freezer? yes. and I might die without it.
garbage disposal - y/n? No. They will RUIN your septic system.
handbook - y/n? hahahaha. yeah, right.
ironing - love it or hate it? hate, hate, hate.
junk drawer - where is it? In the microwave cabinet. i clean it out once a year or so.
kitchen - design and decorating? Reddish beadboard, the top half of the walls are tan. Handmade built in bench set and handmade oak cabinets. Hardwood floors.
love - what is your favorite part of homemaking? When it's done. Second place answer: cooking.
mop - y/n? Well, sort of. Mostly swiffer wet jet.
nylons - wash them by hand or in the washer? I usually wear tights, if anything. But 'washer'.
oven - do you use the window or open it to check? Open it.
pizza - what do you put on yours? peppers & onions or meatballs
quiet - what do you do during the day when you get a quiet moment? Read. Books, blogs or a magazine.
recipe card box - Nope, no box.
style of house – Log cabinish.
tablecloths and napkins - y/n? Um, no. Well, we use napkins - obviously. But as a Certified Laundry Hater...why create more?
under the kitchen sink – Cleaning supplies, trash can, dustpan & sweeper.
vacuum - how many times a week? At least twice. See photo in previous post.
wash - how many loads do you do a week? I knew there had to be a laundry question. Cripes, I've never counted but at least seven.
x’es - do you keep a list of things to do and cross them off? Not all the time, but if I have alot to do, sure.
yard - who does what? We both mow and spread mulch and plant stuff and trim trees & bushes. But he's in charge of the firewood, fertilizing and honestly - he does more mowing & raking than I do. And actually the son does some too.
zzz’s - what is your last homemaking task for the day? taking care of the pets (guinea pig hay & letting the dog out, making sure he has water and that the furniture is covered with books or those big lego boards as Baxter rather enjoys sleeping on the couch). Oh, and in the winter - filling the wood stove for the night.

Pucks and Pups

My boy has hockey tryouts today, for next season. The coach recommended he go out for the A team. I'm nervous for him. Nervous he'll make it and whoa, it's the A TEAM, holy skating. And nervous he won't make it and be disappointed. His coach has basically said he'd be a B if he doesn't make the A's, which hasn't really registered with him yet. Either way it's a step up but I'm really keeping my fingers crossed for him. Would you mind crossing a finger or two between noon and two?

So the dog is well. We don't have the biopsy results back yet but the surgery went well. He's got alot of stitches and is wearing one of those elizabethian collars. Today he snuck down into the cellar to lie in front of the woodstove. Let's just say he enjoys lying with his front paws on the bricks and with his body, like, 10 inches from the stove. And he's black - a veritable heat magnet. He generally comes upstairs panting, just about to pass out and he's so hot to the touch that it HURTS. The dog freakin' burns us.

So today the girlie lets him in from outside where, earlier in the day, his first time out unsupervised - he breaks the collar. The $20.00 collar that was barely 12 hours old. Okay, so in he comes. I'm upstairs getting dressed and a few minutes go by...I remember I forgot to blockade the cellar door...the gateway to hell (and yes, it sometimes IS that hot down there). I run downstairs calling his name. I get to the cellar and I see the dog, in front of the stove, loathe to move. The goddamn collar is melted. It's all warped and soft and burning hot. Baxter is blissfully unaware. I scorch my hand trying to reshape the dang thing before it cools off.

So, a day in to this ten day collar wearing thing he's looking like a jucket. All duct tape and warpy. (Jucket is a very regional term for, um, a bub. As in a 'bub jucket'. How to explain...Sort of like a backwater, hillbilly type - I guess) See, learn something new every day.

The garbage disposal dog is in for surgery today. He had this cyst/tumor that had to be removed toot sweet and so back to the vet's he went. We also found out he has lyme disease, so we started antibiotic-ing him for that too. They're going to biopsy his lump and, I guess, find out if it's cancer. Which, as I set sail on the river denial, I cannot even comprehend.

Did I mention he also eats the carrot noses right off of a snowman's face? Yeah, well he does. Plus he actually eats the snowmen if you don't stack up the snowman parts fast enough.

Barring any troublesome medical treatments for the dog, I am wanting to plan a weekend away. With the kids, I suppose. Unless I can finagle a girl's weekend somehow. I'm getting cabin fever - it's either cold or frigidly cold up here, with no snow and when it does warm up a bit? It. Is. Muddy.

The husband's layoff is coming to an end, hopefully in the next few weeks. He has gotten so much done. NOT.

He's made two shutters for the shed, which are nice enough and look like we could've ordered them out of this catalog. But. When I orginally saw them in that catalog, I thought that even I could put something like that together. If I were so inclined. But I'm not, I wasn't and he was laid off. So he made two. Oh so productive. But they are kind of nice so I guess I won't say too much. Yeah, right.

We Are Lunatics

Eight and a half months. Football season comes and goes as does basketball. We overlap the first four to five weeks of baseball season too.

We get to the rink a full hour before a game because the coach wants them dressed and ready at least twenty minutes prior to faceoff. Make it thirty to forty minutes during playoffs.

We drive, usually, a minimum of a half hour to actually get to the rink du jour. In this case we're lucky...we know folks traveling out of state every other weekend.

We spend untold amounts in what I like to refer to as a snack tax. Or that's what I call the spare change/dollars that are spent on post game slushes for the boy and during the game gumballs and such for the girlie.

We can quote the Herb Brooks Miracle speech by heart. Or almost.

We travel with blankets, winter hats, gloves and jackets. Year round.

We sacrifice sleepovers, school functions and birthday parties. Sacrifice is the wrong word. Opt out is a better choice.

The parents rate the rinks by temperature and visibility. The kids know the ice surface of every rink within playing distance and they have definite preferences.

We pray for a good coach, convenient ice times and nice parents. This year we got a hat trick.

Our team, at 19-1-3 is the second best team in the league (out of, about fifty teams or so). They are not a crazy scoring machine - we have a superb goalie and a stellar defense. Today was the first round of the playoffs and we played the first place team - who've scored twice as many goals as our guys (and girl) and were undefeated.

Our coach who's a police officer and prison guard, is all business probably 95 percent of the time. The kids respect the heck out of him. And I have to say, so do I. He knows hockey like no one I've ever met. He's fair and honest and inspires the kids to want to do their best. He tolerates no shit. Not from his own kids, not from the team, not from other teams. He's only coached for three years, this is his first winning team. He is so proud of these kids and they are proud to skate for him. It is awesome to watch.

Honestly, I didn't expect them to win today. I was hoping they'd be able to keep them down to 3 or 4 goals (down from their 8 goal a game average). We don't have alot of big goal scorers - Most games have been won by a goal, maybe two. My hopes weren't high. The boy however (and the coach's son - who happens to be a great friend of the boy) did not even entertain the idea of losing.

And as my boy would say "We schooled 'em."

4-1.

Not a blowout by any stretch of the imagination but a good, solid win. Those kids have never played better. The other team wasn't as tough as they thought but from the moment the puck dropped our kids were gunning to win that game. They want that big trophy and they're one game closer.

I say we when I refer to hockey...as in "We played a good game". I don't always do it and generally it's only when talking to other parents but then I started listening. We all do it. Yeah, some will say we live vicariously. And maybe we do. Except that hockey is nothing BUT a team sport, and at this age, parents included. The kids on the ice - the parents off of it. We spend alot of time together...I see these folks more than I see my parents and my best friends. We commiserate over hot chocolate and coffee. We compare practice drills and discuss the pros and cons of composite sticks. We carpool and share blankets. We're in it together.

The coach could not finish his post game speech. He got a little choked up and gave the floor over to my husband and the other assistants. I think he'll be the coach I compare all future coaches by...which, sorry new coaches, but the bar has been set.

We invited the coach and his family over yesterday after the game for some pizza, beer and a post game recap. We wives figure if they can relive the plays with each other then we won't have to pretend to remember each deke and save later on. A few hours later another family shows up. Then a few dads. Then another dad. The next thing we know it's after ten p.m. - the pizza's gone, the beer - just about, the kids are on their fourth wind, the wives are wondering how we're getting them all up for school the next day, the husbands are debating the finer points of men's league hockey and A team tryouts.

We kick everyone out and my boy looks at me and says "That. Was. Awesome."

So, there ya go.

Things the Dog Has Eaten in the Past Three Months

1. Two loaves of bread.

2. Container of Peanut Butter (1/2 full)

3. Unopened Stick of Butter

4. Gingerbread house & all attached candy and gumballs

5. Guinea Pig cage stuff (recycled paper, droppings too - i assume)

6. Jar of Fish Food

7. 2 cupcakes

8. A dozen or so cookies (different types, left over from book group)

9. Tupperware container of guinea pig food (in all fairness he did leave the container)

10. A blow pop

11. Four hot dog rolls

12. Things I haven't realized he's eaten yet.

This dog is almost eleven years old. He's grey around the muzzle and his eyes are getting cloudy and he's developing some sort of cysty thing that I think is okay but with yipes, may not be. He's decided that if he can reach it - it's his. And he's tall enough to reach the top of the table and the back burner of the stove.

Never mind the fact that each and every time we leave the house we have to shut the bedroom doors and put things all over the furniture because he long ago decided that he just was NOT suited to sleeping on the floor. Unless it's the floor in front of the wood stove. He makes an exception for that.

People aren't kidding when they say that it's not about training the dog, it's about training the owners. We're always forgetting to stow the bread in the back corner of the counter before one of us is running out the door to the bus stop or put the extra cupcakes in the microwave before we leave the house. Because, while the dog might be trainable while we're home - he's whooping it up the minute we drive away.

We, uh, have finally sorted out the troubles with the girlie. Seems she has mono. Which, I'm actually - at this point - happy about. There was a brief scare on Friday where they were concerned about her liver not functioning correctly but that seems to have righted itself.

The strep throat thing from two weeks ago - mono related. Weird leg rash which turned out to be bruising - mono related. The bands on her socks and the seams that run up her legs on her pajama bottoms? They actually left bruises on her legs. Her blood wasn't clotting correctly.

Good times.

I'm praying the boy doesn't get it. Or anyone else we know, for that matter. Come to find out there was alot of water bottle sharing going on around here during our pond hockey weekends.

Anyhow.

Hockey is going well for the boy this year. They're something like 18-1-2, which throws them in second place out of 48 teams. Playoffs start Sunday. We went to the coach's house for dinner last night and I joked that my husband was going to come with his dry erase board and notebooks. Coach P says "There'd be nothing better." and he meant it. This guy won't be getting much sleep all week.

But all it took was one "Hey, buddy - I really need you at skills this week, big week for us - it'd help to get another good skate in before the weekend" to my son and he was all agreeable about going to skills, which is the only part of playing hockey he complains about.

So, that being said I've invited Coach P to come over and give the prebook report pep talk next month. Because if there's one thing he complains about more than skills - it's book reports.

I thought I had a post started in drafts....

I guess not.

It's been a week. One of those weeks.

Lets see... it started, although I didn't know it at the time, with a complaint of a sore throat last Sunday (not the one that just passed, the one before). We'd spent the day skating and such and after dinner the girlie told me that her throat was bothering her. It was a busy Sunday which had followed a busy Saturday so I chalked it up to exhaustion, gave her some motrin before bed and forgot all about it.

Fast Forward: 9:50 p.m. Monday Night (i.e. last ten minutes of Heroes). She jumps out of bed and heads into the living room instead of the bathroom. Let's just say I spent the last ten minutes of Heroes scrubbing my carpet.

She threw up a few times on Tuesday and during the day on Wednesday. By Wednesday night though, the poor girl, she was s.i.c.k. sick. She hadn't really kept anything down since this whole thing started and I kept thinking 48 hours and it should be out of her system. It so wasn't. When we went to the pediatrician's on Thursday (where she basically just laid on the table and threw up a few times into their trash can) morning he wanted her admitted to the hospital - immediately. She had lost 12% of her body weight - in four days. So, my poor baby, we got her all checked in and IV'd up and there we sat. Tons and tons of fluids and lots of Nickelodeon. When it became clear that the puking wasn't going to stop she got some anti-nausea medication that worked wonders.

As a side note, to add to my mini-drama - my cell phone wouldn't work in the hospital and seeing that I had only one battery bar left...I shut it off and figured I'd keep it for the ride home. I tried to call the husband who had left for a four day fishing trip on Thursday morning, no luck. The hospital phone service A. couldn't charge a call to my Vonage telephone number or any cell phone number and B. wouldn't charge a third party call to a credit card. Nice. The nurse was nice enough to let me use the regular phone but I've gotta tell yeh...trying to arrange the rest of my life without a direct line to the outside world...was tough. Plus, my mom, who truth be told, is not the most maternal sort...well she just kind of stunned me with her ways. And while he was in Maine? My husband's water pump broke on his truck (and we are thanking god now he didn't decide to come home on Thursday night - broken down in Maine with a bunch of guys to help you is much, much better than being broken down somewhere on the highway in the dark, by yourself). But still, it was 15 below zero outside when they were fixing it. Oh, and on Sunday - when he woke up - he was sick too, with some Noravirus or something (or so says the doctor).

Anyhow, it ended up being strep with a side order of dehydration. It's amazing how fast your world can shrink down to where the most important thing is keeping 1 oz. of fluid down or debating whether you really need three wet wipes for her to get a clean urine sample.

She came home Friday evening and with one dose of antibiotic in her and some good ole fashioned chicken broth...she was well on her way to recovery.

Except for Saturday. When she got hives all on the tops of her feet. And then Sunday, with the girlie seemingly fine, we leave for hockey. Look At My Hands! She says as we're on our way. All red and hivey. I stop at the pharmacy, get some anti-inch stuff and some antihistimine spray and head to the rink. For a double header. The hives go away after a bit, as is the way with these things and again...she seems fine. That night though, I see them on her legs and arms so I give her some benadryl and snug her up in bed. Monday she is riddled with them. I call the doctor and get an appointment for later in the day...as a bonus I've noticed another rash is coming up...this one isn't itchy and is dark reddish with blotchy circles.

The doctor, who isn't one I normally see anymore because he's a bit of an alarmist...well, he alarms me. They're thinking the hives are an allergy to Zithromax (she's already allergic to Penecillin *sigh*) Lesions like these could be "askdjf;arejkdfjasakg" (insert the name of something I didn't even understand and couldn't possibly remember) and could form on her internal organs and let's get some blood work to make sure her kidneys are still functioning okay.

Gulp.

So yesterday evening it was more blood work and a pee sample and the eternal crossing of the fingers. I really think she's okay and the labs must've been fine because they haven't called me back. I balanced out the blood draw with a trip to Build a Bear. She had a rather large gift card but I had told her that she couldn't buy a bear, just outfits...she was okay with that but she was bumming. After the blood thing, I gave in, she got herself a bear and an outfit plus I got her new bear a set of pajamas and some sneakers. Getting rid of the crummies with a trip to her favorite store on earth...best medicine ever.

She goes for a recheck tomorrow. Like I said, I'm thinking she's okay...that this is just a strep reaction but gawd, whatta week.

An Embarrassment of Riches

Oh, library book sale, how I love you. A guilt free twenty five dollars and look at the take:

Odd Thomas and Forever Odd by Dean Koontz - I don't love Koontz or hate him but Odd Thomas is our latest book club choice so I figured I'd pick up the sequel too.

The Lost Continent by Bill Bryson - I've read In a Sunburned Country and A Walk in the Woods - both were great- how could I resist?

The World Below by Sue Miller - I liked something else she wrote, can't remember it now but for fifty cents...worth a shot.

The Narrows, Chasing the Dime, City of Bones & Angels Flight all by Michael Connelly - The Harry Bosch series comes highly recommended...again, why not?

Little Altars Everywhere by Rebecca Wells - Amy liked it.

With No One as Witness & Missing Joseph both by Elizabeth George. I read In the Presence of the Enemy and enjoyed it.

The Probable Future & Here On Earth both by Alice Hoffman - Meh, I'm reading Practical Magic now and maybe I'm not far enough into it but it's not grabbing my attention at all. Alot of people seem to like her... I'll give her another shot...

The Shipping News by Annie Proulx - I've wanted to read this for years and never got around to picking it up. Now that I have it, it just may sit for a year or so. Still, it'll be here when I need it.

Goodnight Nobody by Jennifer Weiner - Okay, so Sarah Louise and MommaK both mentioned it in my comments the other day and what was the first book I saw when I got to the libraray? It must've been meant to be.

Blue Blood by Edward Conlon - I read a review for this years ago, back when it first came out and thought I'd like it. I stumbled on it this past weekend...we shall see...

To the Nines and Ten Big Ones by Janet Evanovich - I don't want to like these but I cannot stop.

Sherlock Holmes the Complete Novels and Stories - yeah, I'm not sure what possessed me, my latest mystery reading kick, I think. Still, I'm surprised I haven't read any of these and they may sit with The Shipping News but they'll probably get read.

The Glorious Appearing by Tim LaHaye - I know, I know. Me. Reading this. I've read all of them and one thing's for sure...Left Behind is where I'll be. And hey, if someday all the goodish people disappear they make it clear that I'll have plenty of chances to change my stubborn mind. What kills me is that the story could be phenomenal if only these books were written by someone with actual writing skill. Gahd, they're like reading bad fiction by a 6th grader. But I must finish what I've started.

East of Eden by John Steinbeck - Quite simply, one of my all time favorite books. Which I didn't own and now I only own a very crummy copy but at least I can read it at my leisure.

A Girl Named Zippy by Haven Kimmel - I don't know, I think I heard something good about this so I grabbed it.

Tara Road by Maeve Binchy - Yeah. Well, I skipped Amy's book review because I was sure it was downstairs on my book shelf waiting for a beach trip. Turns out that was Echoes or someother such title. I had to get it just so I could read it.

Maine - An Explorer's Guide - Maine. We love it and we're always looking for a new destination for a day trip.

Lucky Man by Michael J. Fox - Eh, we'll see. I'm in no rush for this one.

Hunting Season by Nevada Barr - I love this series, set in National Parks. I read Flashback awhile ago and just recently started at the first in the set. Perfect for the armchair traveler. As the real traveler's husband would need employment to fund his wife's jaunts to all of these places.

Some random Dean Koontz books, a book on National Parks, a Hardy Boys book, Howliday Inn and some easy readers for the girl (who is READING actual books!!!) and that about summed up the trip.

Oh. And if you happen to be at the mall with a friend and see some gloves that look mighty warm. Be sure to try them on first.

Or you may end up looking suspiciously like Cookie Monster.

It's a balmy twenty seven degrees today...

I think the word verification guys are privately applauding my newly honed skill of correctly typing their mumbo jumbo and are now giving me 15 letter things to type in.

Our Uno tournament has gone from weekend long to winter long and now my daughter is regularly saying things like "let's take it downtown" and then hits me with a Reverse, reverse, skip, draw two, draw two, six.

Let's take it downtown???

She's winning by a thousand points.

There are all these people posting about all these books that they've been buying/reading. I feel like an addict getting a fix when I read these things. And my 'to read' list keeps growing and growing...

Amy's been doing these fantastic book reviews and I will try to follow suit. I've just read the bestselling "The Memory Keeper's Daughter".

Meh.

What? You expected more?

Some random Tuesday Stuff

My computer is full. Or nearly so. A few weeks ago I had to dump about 500 meaningless pictures so that I'd have room to add 500 more meaningless pictures and a few Weird Al songs for the boy's shuffle. Are external hard drives easy to hook up? Does it just need a USB connection? Anyone?

*vent*I want to quit Daisy Scouts. I've recently discovered that the lady who is a co-leader with me, well she apparently never says no to her kids. Her kindergardener is up until 10:00 p.m. and she literally stopped the meeting in it's tracks so that she could question all of us as to how we got our kids into bed so early and she got all fake airheady and amazed "oh my god, did you hear that T? They go to bed at 8:00...how come you don't go to bed at 8:00?" ugh. And her son, literally runs wild through the library for the hour long meeting (we see the children's librarian speaking to him frequently) and interupts the meeting at least five times. And she takes cell phone calls during the whole meeting too. */end vent*

15+ inches of ice. Too bad it's almost too cold to skate.

One of our best friends just had some pretty major surgery. She made it through okay and her cyst wasn't malignant so we are breathing a huge sigh of relief. She called me on Sunday to tell me to take care of her husband and to let me know that if I or another friend was to end up with him somehow to make sure we keep him in line and to be kind of bitchy towards him because that's what he's used to.

A point of clarification : Hosting a "bookless" book club does not constitute a girl's night out for the hostess. Not that my husband reads this, I'm just sayin'.

MeMe or Not MeMe

Me.

Not me.
Me.
Not me.Me. (minus the logoy stuff)
Not me.

Me.Not me.

Me.

Not me.

Me.

Not me.Me.
Not me.

Me.

Not me.

Me.

Not me.

Me.

Not me.
Me.
Not me.

Me.Not me.
Me.
Not me.



courtesy of blackbird and badger

Is it really a post if I don't type anything?

HowManyOfMe.com

There are: 126 people with my name in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

Lace 'em up boys

A six quart crockpot filled with chili

Three dozen steamed hotdogs

Many chicken wings

Two giant thermoses filled with hot chocolate (peppermint schnapps, optional)

30 bottles of water

Many cans of beer

Two dozen brownies, a dozen chocolate chip squares and a dozen cupcakes

Chips & salsa, jax and popcorn

+

Eightish inches of ice and forty (!!!!) people

=

Sunday afternoon at my house.


In the latest great debate entitled "Should we invite the whole team?" we did, in fact, invite the whole team. Plus a few families from teams past. There were alot of idon'tknows and we'll sees in the locker room on Sunday morning. But post game, when the goalie shouted "Hey, whose going skating at *boy's name* house?!?!" Well, that appears to have tipped the scales. Many parents caved to the begging and we had a full house. Or full pond.

My heart skipped a bit when they started pulling in, especially because about 15 of the people were all firmly among the "thanks, but I doubt it" camp. Obviously, pleading children and 35 degree weather won out.

Beer Sled

Saturday we had the entire pond to ourselves. The boy had two friends over to skate and they could literally skate the entire thing, shore to shore. A rare occurance in these parts and to these boys? Very, very cool. A pesky one inch of snow fell on Saturday night so the husband and son took to the ice at seven a.m. clearing a rink for a game and a smaller rink for twirly girls (figure skaters) and littler kids with big paths connecting them to form a loop. Dedicated guys, those two.

• Day Three of the 102.3 degree fever. The girlie not me.

• Day Five of the UNO Winter Tournament. I'm only losing to her by 650 points.

• Day Twelve of Winter Layoff 2007. He's cutting firewood today, but he's working on making wooden shutters for the house and shed.

• Day Two of Waiting for Football Season to Begin Season.

• Day Twenty Six of credit cardless spending.

• Day Twenty of wondering if there will be a reply to an email that might have effectively ended a seven year long friendship.

• Day Four of Realizing it didn't upset me quite as much as I would've thought. But still, it did upset me.

• Twenty three days until the annual ice fishing trip for the husband. I've told the kids they could spend their holiday gift cards and my own personal plan is to watch a ton of movies and spend guiltless time on the computer into the wee hours of the morning. We are all counting down.
  

Okay, okay, okay

So the Patriots didn't get to do any showoffy moves centerfield. And I'm bummed.

But hey, they just didn't have what it took this year. Watching Peyton pray on the sidelines as Tommy marched his team back up the field with under a minute to go...you have to know that even Peyton thought it could be done. And this year...that will have to be enough for me.

There will be no Super Bowl party, no watching of the commercials because I've promised myself that I would never NEVER watch Peyton in a SuperBowl. Ever. And so football season, in my house, has ended.

As the Colts began their last drive back up the field I said to my husband:

Want to know my fantasy ending?
he just looks at me...

the Colts run the clock down to mere seconds...they are well within field goal range but can't get a first down.

Vinatieiri takes the field.

Seconds tick away.

Cue Gil Santos as announcer:

The snap. The kick. He shanks it right- NO GOOD!!! The kick is wide! The kick is WIDE!

End Gil.

Vinatieri jumps for joy...

Then, Superman like, he rips his Colts jersey off to reveal his true colors....his old number 4 Pats jersey.

The Patriots win the game!

Okay, so it's not plausible but it really would've been something, eh?

And Kate, what's with all the Tomhate? I don't take it personally but according to my girlie, she's marrying him - so he's practically family...do you know something I don't?

while I suppose I'm rooting for New Orleans, I'm doubting they'll win. I'm doubting even more if I can stay awake through this boring game. yawn.

i missed all the hoopla surrounding the Patriots win last week. Unsportsmanlike? Maybe...More unsportsmanlike than trash talking a team during week prior to the game? More unsportsmanlike than suggesting, post game, that it was done with the coach's direction?

My two cents: People are passionate about sports. Fans, sure, but imagine being a player. Sure, you're paid alot of money (more money than you should be but that's neither here nor there) you're alot of things to alot of people...hero, role model, scapegoat, object of my affection (that would be you Mr. Rodney Harrison)...-ehem, anyway...you spend the week listening to just how terribly you do your job and just how much better someone else is. You've been overlooked as far as individual honors and maybe you really don't want to go to Hawaii but you know you should've been invited. I mean, Merriman? Hello, didn't he miss quarter of the season for violating the substance abuse policy? Really now, that's company you'd be better off without. So, you're being put down, not given a chance to win and you go out and play one of the most physical games around. And then something unexpected happens...you win. And maybe you shouldn't do it, but you do...take that league MVP, take that Shawn Merriman, take that naysayers. Enjoy your stay in Hawaii, and hey, now y'all can leave a few weeks early.

Does LT really think Bill Belichick okayed all of that? I'm sure not, it hardly seems his style. I think emotion got the best of those guys and they all heard about it in the mandatory full team practice on Wednesday. I think emotion got the best of LaDanien when he repeated the coaching comment later in the week, disappointing end to a stellar season...can't be easy, but as a friend of mine says "Suck it up, Buttercup."

I didn't have a problem with Harrison doing the eagle wave when the Pats won the Super Bowl, I don't disapprove of the Merriman imitation and I'm wishing the Colts had some sort of signature dance that the Pats could perform on that big blue horseshoe in the dome after they win later on today.

Sigh.

I am alone. In my own home. For the first time in too long.

We are about done recuperating. The hockey tournament was exhausting. Late nights, lots o' boys, snowball fights, intense hockey games..




Getting ready to tee up on the goalie.







Post Snowball fight exhaustion. See that two inches of snow? Not very wintery for January in New Hampshire...but no matter, it was perfectly playable.







Inspirational team meeting.






We parked our car on Friday and left it until Monday. The whole village is centered around this square...hockey rink included. There were fireworks on Saturday night and it did actually snow while we were there...not to mention the ice storm we drove home in. I thought I would go a little stir crazy - and I did - but it was survivable. Much more so because I could walk to the bakery for hot chocolate to escape the knee hockey madness that overtook the boys. And our living/common area.





Little rink rats sisters. Whose throats were hoarse from breathing in the superchlorinated air in the pool. They're pretty good sports considering an ice hockey rink is one of the dullest places on earth...if you don't watch hockey.






This number 11? Played the best hockey he's ever played and learned why good sportsmanship is so much more preferable than bad. Seeing a Squirt A (our's are C's) team from Rhode Island come in and skate circles around them, all the while taunting our boys and complaining to the refs when they were called for penalties. He took notice...they all did. Sometimes the winning team doesn't necessarily have the higher score.


Oh, did I mention that due to two poorly scheduled hockey games I MISSED THE LAST THREE QUARTERS OF THE PATRIOTS GAME? And had to rely on a 12 year old who was sneaking into a bar for updates? No? Yeah, well I did. I really didn't mind, still don't in fact...but let me just say there will be little to no parenting happening after 6:30 p.m. this Sunday.

yipes. a week, eh?

I'm fine.

I'll be back tonight to post.

First of all....

Go here. Go on, go wish Jen a Happy Birthday ~ she's a sweetie...a YOUNG sweetie. I hope it blizzards for her tonight.

*taps foot, waits impatiently* And, please Jen, take no offense that I'm foot tapping...I'm just impatient by nature.

Back?

Okay, well I guess we'll see how well I can sign on to a random wireless network this weekend...

We're heading to Waterville Valley, NH for a hockey tournament. Oh, the joy. Fourteen boys and one girl with their families. When booking the hotel room the clerk offers me a room that sleeps ten. Um, no - I'm not going to host the knee hockey tournament in my room. So the only other room available was a regular ole hotel room...away from the other team. The clerk said it like it was a bad thing but I'm thinking 'hey, no early morning or late night kids playing ding dong ditch?' I think we'll be fine.

There is an obscene amount of packing today as it turns out there is only three days of hockey during our four day stay.

And being the impatient soul that I am, I don't do bored very well. So. I will pack. Stuff.

Stuff being: knitting (a scarf in my boy's hockey colors), 2 issues of Vanity Fair, Ipod (recently downloaded with Tetris and some Battlestar Galactica - I know, I know...GEEK!), Laptop, Alias Grace (very good, just very little time to dedicate to reading...so not like me) Uno Attack, Cribbage, Blisters and Pictionary Junior.

Gretsky the Guinea Pig is visiting friends. Baxter the Lab is staying home, with occasional adult supervision and that, I think...is that.

So, tell me now....what will I forget?

wow. things sure are different with the husband home.

A. lack of blogging/computer time. Sheesh, he's a task master and a master of the guilt trip.

B. he comes with me places. I had to pick up a hockey sweatshirt for the boy a few towns over and he drove. it was kind of nice.

C. he comes with me places. Christ, give me some space already.

D. the laundry is folded. the grill rotisserie we've had for almost a year was put together and installed, the cellar is halfway cleaned, he promised to go food shopping tomorrow and he's going to grab a battery for the dog collar today. After he buys the boy some snow boots and me the latest copy of Vanity Fair. At the mall.

E. I too am a master of the guilt trip.



As an aside - we cooked a pork roast on the rotisserie last night...excellent.

Here I am. On my couch. Blogging and watching the Grease/American Idol thing.

On my laptop.

With the wireless connection.

The other day with all the negative, woe is me...yeah, not so bad now.

Plus today I got some baby smooching time in with my favorite three month old.

Baby smooching courtesy of SneakyPeek with wireless access brought to you by the SP husband.

Really, I might've hugged him. If I was the hugging type.

IN which I learn to not blog about financial messes because there's always something else waiting to drop on my head like an anvil

So, it was suggested that there be no blogging of husbands and jobs.

Well that will be easy.

My husband has been laid off and the job *poof* is no longer.



In all fairness, he was the last one to go this year and we're going with the assumption that he'll be called back when work picks up again. It's likely that there'll be work for him before spring but really, there are no guarantees.

On the bright side - he can take over half the carpool, lunch making, backpack packing duties.

Well, yeah. The movie was terrible. Bad acting!! (exclamation points merited) and a complete ripoff of LOTR in some places. Never mind the fact that the movie just didn't go from point A to point B with any plausibility. I expected better.

New Year's Eve was a mellow affair. We were with friends but no one was feeling it so a bunch of us just hung around, chatting and completely sober. Christmas trees were set ablaze in the middle of the cul-de-sac. Good times.

Monday was the last day of vacation and we did nothing. Or next to nothing as playing Uno Attack, Pictionary Jr and The Littlest Pet Shop Game and watching National Treasure doesn't amount to a whole lot.

I napped.

Then it was back to school. Back to the dentist's, a different dentist - one who couldn't help the boy (immature tooth, blah, blah blah) and then on the phone for almost an hour with a new endodontist. Dudes, I'm getting tired of teeth.

As for resolutions? Two.

Quit with the yelling.

and

Work on being debt free. This year was a financial disaster for us...the husband was laid off for two months - and then, with the company's legal "issues" they aren't allowed to bid on any jobs that are funded by the state. Which means his rate of pay dropped considerably. Then it was my huge car troubles, new tires for both vehicles, two root canals and remaking the teeth, an oven that died and needs repair, a washing machine that died and was replaced. Oye.

I just picked up some more work, we switched phone services, I'm cancelling netflix (and maybe cable if my husband keeps being jerky), switching our cell phones to a prepaid option (we barely use them), eating out only every other week, and no credit card use. Well, with the exception of an occasional internet order or say, booking a hotel for a hockey tournament. I have to be realistic.

I'm curious to see how I'll do.

Quick Movie Review

just in case you were thinking you'd go see Eragon today.

Don't.

Well, here we are. Just me and the boy.

Best laid plans were thwarted but it's nice to have him here with me. I guess. He's kind of loud and requires food.

The kids' room are clean. So's the playroom and bathroom. The kitchen and living room are about at the halfway point.

My room, meh. We'll see how much time I've got left.

After all.

We must:

• Go to hockey practice.

• Get Dinner. Because I don't cook anything major, like dinner, when the husband leaves for just one night. If he's gone for a weekend, that's different, but overnight...nah.

• See Eragon. The boy is on page 385 out of 497. As long as he makes it to page 400 (or close) we're going.

• Watch Brokeback Mountain or Deadwood. Or both.

• Get a mouse for the laptop.

Priorities. Each and every one of them.

This Just In

We were tentatively planning a trip to Maine, just an overnight to the parent's cabin.

My husband said that if I'd rather stay home to take down the decorations and such, that would be fine by him.

Oh my.

Decisions, decisions....

So I've not taken down any holiday decorations, except the village. Am I the only one? I'm officially blaming it on the illness I've caught but truth be told, I kind of don't mind what's left. Including the dead tree.

It's not brown, people, just dead.

I totally entered a time warp yesterday.

We went roller skating. Brown boot, four orange wheels, carpeted surfaces everywhere rollerskating. The rink, for not having had any significant updates in probably 25 years, had fresh coats of paint on the walls and was well kept. But still. There were disco balls and Kool and the Gang or something equally seventyish was blaring from the loudspeakers. I laughed out loud when I walked in. Until I saw the very updated price of admission.

The girlie had fun and the boy, showing off his (in girlie parlance) mad skating skillz pestered me to leave the entire time we were there (this is bore-ring, it's just skating in circles, how much longer, etc) and then told my husband he had a great time. yeah, okay then.

I spent the ENTIRE night, a few nights, ago, trying to set up a router and wireless card for the 'ole notebook computer. Dear god, I wish I knew what I was doing. Five and a half hours of my life that I'll never get back and still not successful. The router is in and I, quite obviously, have internet access and phone (I have vonage so NO internet access isn't an option for us). The wireless card is installed and seems to be working on the notebook - it gives me a signal strength and everything...it just won't let me connect.

Grrr.

But on the bright side, the girlie is at her friend's house and the boy is using up everybit of his Runecape Membership. It is blissfully quiet. And I've got me some Arrested Development to watch. Buh-bye!

So the root canals were kind of a bust.

Liquid valium given the night before and the morning of had basically NO effect. Both the doctor and one of the assistants asked me what dosage I had given, if any, because most people are thrown for a loop with that stuff.

But, nonworking narcotics aside, he was brave and resolute. He got two thousand five or six shots of novacaine...two or three in his gums and two or three in the roof of his mouth. The roof of his mouth that does NOT get any pain relief from the topical analgesic.

And then they did the cold test, with my boy in tears, and he still had plenty of feeling in there. The assistant calmed him while the endodontist came out and chatted with me about other options. Sedation! Restraints?!?! And went back in, to renovacaine. The boy cried and refused and that, my friends, was that.

He said the shots in the gums were painful but okay but he just couldn't take any more to the roof of his mouth. Poor kid. Part of me wanted to just beg him to suck it up for a minute or two more the other part, the part that won, hugged him tight and took him home.

We were given some very general referrals..."Call Tufts or Boston University, they both have pedodontic departments, sorry we don't have the phone numbers"... I spent the better part of the morning on the phone trying to find a endo guy who works on kids and doesn't rely exclusively on novacaine. HAH! The joke was on me. Apparently they don't exist. The 72nd office I called referred me to Children's Hospital in Boston. Yeah, sure...I figured it'd be another dead end. It's not. They totally have a dental department and once they get the referrals they'll be calling me to make an appointment. Phew.

10 Holiday Mysteries

1. Why did our tree, which we cut down ourselves, die a sudden and horrible death weeks ago? Shouldn't it live longer than the ones trucked down from Canada? It was watered regularly and the super drying woodstove wasn't on much and still pfft...dead. We're supposed to bring it to a New Year's Eve party where they burn the trees in a huge bonfire...it won't have even one needle left. However, a corner of my living room rug will be turning up pine needles until June.

2. Why did my husband ask my son to fill the birdfeeders on Christmas Eve? Kismet, I guess because the cabinet where the birdfood is kept is the EXACT SAME PLACE I stashed the Santa Claus wrapping paper after I had finished wrapping all the stocking stuffers earlier that afternoon. He totally saw the paper and at that point the boy had no idea what it was (or why there was a random roll of wrapping paper thrown in a cabinet in the cellar) and he laid it on my husband's workbench. After all the Eve festivities I was in the cellar warming up by the woodstove and I spied the wrapping paper. Thank god my husband told me that the boy moved it otherwise A.) The whole santa thing would've been outed and B.) I wouldn't have gotten to spend another hour first deciding the best course of action (1a. lazy = leave gifts wrapped and hope for the best. OR 1b. less lazy= rewrap with paper I had in my 4runner that he may have seen making the rewrap possibly pointless.) and then rewrapping all the stocking gifts at 11:45 that night.

3.) Why don't I remember to hide the gingerbread house? When I saw one of the gingerbread christmas trees and a speamint leaf missing I thought it was the girlie...I should've known. Four days later I left to go grocery shopping, when I returned there was only a sad plastic tray left. A sad plastic tray and a very sick dog. I guess I should be thankful the girlie got the croup that night so I was only kept awake for one entire night instead of two seperate ones.

4.) Why does my brother in law think I like him?

5.) Why does the convenient USB port on the front of the computer recognize my video iPod and camera but not my son's new shuffle? It only took me three hours of intermittent installing, restarting and clicking to find that other USB port on in the back.

6.) When was the last time I vacuumed behind the computer? ew.

7.) Why can't I spell vaccuumed? vacuumed? vacuummed?

8.) Why does Tom Brady not have a proper wide receiver? And more importantly do you think he broke up with his girlfriend because she proved to be a distraction this year as he's struggling more than usual as he DOES NOT HAVE A CONSISTENT WIDE RECEIVER? This has been an issue all season it will be and even bigger issue post-season. Hey, they played on Christmas Eve and a tight-end was his go to guy...it qualifies as a holiday mystery. To me, anyway.

9.) Is it unchristmasy to pack away decorations before Christmas? I had the entire village packed up and stored by noon on Christmas eve. And I was glad to see it go.

10.) Is it wrong to want us all to sleep in one bed so that I don't have to make three beds every day? The kids will do it if I ask them but they don't make them how I like them, which means I have to redo the bedmaking. I am by no means a clean freak nutso but I can't stand a messy bed.

Jenny's Christmas Countdown

250 - pages left for the boy to read of Eragon. Pages I'd like read before we see the movie.

30- Degrees the temperature needs to drop. Enough of this warm.

11- Days 'till the root canals.

8 - tires needed for both vehicles.

7 - presents to wrap for christmas at my mom's later today.

6 - The amount of Christmas cards I'm short. Note to self: count the list BEFORE you order.

5 -The number of appliances in this house that are on the fritz or just one good cycle past the fritz. Dryer, Microwave, Oven, Dishwasher, Toaster Oven. Plus smoke was coming out of the switch on my blowdryer. That's never good.

4 - days left of sanity school.

1 - The number of times I refrained from calling my husband to question him, in a not so nice manner, on why he left the new guinea pig cage box in the middle of the bathroom floor, where the boy and girl could find it. Find it and read the label.

2- Number of Gift Certificates "misplaced".

2 - times the girl has been sent to her room this morning.

0 - The number of days on my calander that are blank between now and December 28th.


There is an overwhelming temptation to invite all or part of the hockey team over after practice next Saturday.

Help me to resist.

I've been struggling with the whole lack of spirit thing. I thought that maybe it was the weather (meh, 60 degrees in december still kind of sucks) turns out it wasn't.

Anyway, I got this christmas card yesterday, from a friend in blog land, it was just a wee little card but somehow, driving home last night looking at lights and reflecting on the fact that this world is a whole lot smaller than I'd ever thought *insert blog sappiness here* - it hit me...

It's Christmas.

And your stories of choosing trees, feeling scroogish, mailing cards, advent sundays, buying gifts, making dinners and planning parties - they make it more so.

Have a great weekend.

I am ruined

Do not even try to eat Ghiradelli's dark chocolate one day and think, a day or two later, that you will get your chocolate fix by grabbing a hershey's kiss.

The girlie's sidewalk chalk has a smidge less flavor but much the same texture.

The Meme that's been in my drafts folder for weeks just waiting for the most opportune posting moment

Hot chocolate or eggnog?
Hot chocolate - usually. But my father in law makes homemade eggnog, which, if you've never had homemade eggnog, I can't blame you for hating it - the storebought stuff is awful.

Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree?
Santa doesn't give out a whole ton over here. He wraps the small, individual kid stocking trinkets but the toys that go into the large family stocking are unwrapped.

Colored lights on your tree/house or white?
This year the kids finally broke my spirit and got us to put colored lights on the tree. I tested them all and we hung them...only to find that barely half of them worked once they were actually ON the tree. We took them down, thought about testing each light and totally threw them away. We're back to white. The way it was intended.

Do you hang mistletoe?
Not usually. I'm afraid it will fall and the dog will eat it.

When do you put up decorations?
Usually the weekend after Thanksgiving.

What does your favorite christmas meal include?
Generally we have a roast pork dinner which is good, especially because I don't have to cook it but my favorite meal is breakfast with french toast, orange juice, thick cut bacon and real maple syrup.

Favorite christmas memory from childhood?
I remember shopping with my dad. We didn't have much money but he put alot of thought into what he bought my mom, he really loved her.

How and when did you learn the truth about Santa?
I cannot remember, so I'm thinking it wasn't too traumatic.

Do you open a gift on christmas eve?
The kids do. They open their new pajamas. Which match. hehehe.

How do you decorate your christmas tree?
I don't do too much anymore. Just the heavy ornaments that need a strong branch near the top plus a few of the ornaments I made as a kid. The chillens do the rest, results be damned.

Snow! Love it or leave it?
Love, love, love.

Can you ice skate?
Not well but I go out anyway.

Do you remember your favorite gift?
Silly, but a pair of mittens my husband gave me.

What's the most important thing about christmas for you?
Getting good gifts. Ahahahaha! Okay, not really, but a thoughtful gift really does mean something... Really, it's lazing around with the family. First at our house then at the in-laws. Lots of lazing and chatting, by the afternoon there's usually a christmas movie playing in the background. It's just nice and comfortable.

What is your favorite christmas tradition?
The matching pajamas and the J family stocking.

What tops your tree?
A golden star with (what else?) white lights.

What is your favorite christmas song?
O holy night and Oh Come all ye faithful.
This, from a girl who doubts the very existence.

1. Two root canals. Scheduled for December 27th.

2. Officially exceeded the dental insurance maximum payout. By a thousand dollars.

3. But. The insurance re-ups in January.

4. The new teeth, scheduled to be constructed on January 3rd, will be covered.

5. Thanking god this happened in December and not June.

The boy handled the endodontist testing very, VERY well. For a boy who gets all freaky when I try to pull a bandaid off...it's a majorly good thing. He'll be getting some valium the night before and the morning of the root canal "therapy". I will be sipping his last, leftover dose. I'm kidding. I will swig it down, not sip. Sipping is for babies.

Interview with a Vampire

Recently heard in the J household:

"I wish it was all a dream."

"I was "this" close to calling K. And then D called and I wanted to play. If only I called K five minutes earlier. Or even two minutes earlier."

"I can only drink room temperature water?"

"I'm thinking I can maybe get some more computer time out of this..."

"Go ahead...say it. You won't get in trouble, I swear..." "Thit"



And so. His front teeth are broken. Pretty badly. He was playing street hockey with over a friend's house last night and the other boy's stick got stuck in a storm drain grate. The kid gave it a good strong yank and SLAM. The blade hit my boy square in the mouth. His teeth parts fell straight into the storm drain and that, my friends, was that.

My husband was already on his way to pick the boy up, I was out Christmas shopping. (P.S. Retail therapy + Best Friend = Total Able to Cope Mom) My husband calls me and says the boy "had an accident" at D's house. I, for a brief minute, thought he had peed his pants. Which would've been bad enough. Anyway... he tells me his teeth got smashed out, mostly. I, in my head, think there is something more. Something called A PUNCH LINE. Alas, no punch line.

I called the dentist - no emergency hours. I called the pediatrician - an almost immediate and awesomely good natured callback. Sorry, though, nothing they can do. My husband says the boy is in fine spirits, no pain (except for a sore lip) and is doing well. I stay on course with the shopping, buying the boy many shirts at Old Navy while plagued by 'survivor's guilt'.

We got in to see his dentist today. The news isn't all that great. First, it's off to the Endodontist for some testing on the teeth and nerves. One of the nerves is exposed and one is just below the surface and that, apparently, spells trouble. Especially if trouble is spelled R-O-O-T-C-A-N-A-L. The endo guy will either say they're okay or the boy will need root canal "therapy". Which, holy fucking moly...that's supposed to hurt and that's pretty much the way the dentist was leaning. Once the endo guy gives the regular dentist the okay...then we'll start with the reconstructive work. Some sort of temporary measure is all they'll do until he's about twenty. Sort of breakaway teeth, in case he gets hit again. Even the permanent measures, according to the dentist, will be a lifelong bout of dentistry fun for the boy. Damn, damn, damn.
I told him I could return his gifts because I heard

All he wants for Christmas is his two front teeth...

He wasn't that amused.

Making me Happy:

• Finding my Wicked Good Slippers. Got them for christmas last year and totally forgot I had them.

wicked good indeed.

• Squidward: "Have any of you ever played a musical instrument before?"

Patrick: "Is mayonnaise a musical instrument?"

• Squirt Hockey: 10-1-0

• Possible snow in the forecast

• Eight Christmas presents left to buy. And I know EXACTLY what they are.
  

Making me question my sanity:

• The son's attitude (and then punishment for said fit) when he got an answer he really didn't want to hear.

• Husband's pending layoff. Although there are two furniture projects in his plans...so aside from the complete lack of money and possibly loss of health insurance, i will try (i only said TRY) to not let it drive me too batty.

• The guinea pig hair loss issue. Still going on. All advice says "see a vet". And so we will, Monday at 2:45. It could be mites, lack of vitamin C (although with a daily dose of kale, carrots and enriched food - I'm doubting this), dehydration (he drinks, but how do I know if it's 'enough'??) or stress. I'm actually HOPING for mites. Sick, I know but I can kill them, clean the cage and be done with it. I can't control my own stress, never mind a guinea pig's.