Therapy for Hockey Families 101

The end of school vacation looms large on the horizon. There have been no wild and crazy filled with misbehavior days, just a tired mum who is looking forward to a quiet day.

Hockey season is winding down, two regular games left. And here's what's bugging me. My parents. My boy, their grandson, has been playing since August. Games have been on the average, every week. They have not come to even one. Nor have they even expressed any support or interest in this whole thing. Now, I'm not saying that they should love hockey. It's not about loving hockey. When he tells them about goals he's scored or plays that he's made, he'll get a polite nod and maybe, maybe, a 'hmm that's good'.

My mother had dropped hints repeatedly to me about too much sports and pushing him too hard to love hockey and how he only really plays because my husband loves it. Insinuating that my son does not (love it) and only plays to make us happy. I tell her that they're outside shoveling off the pond and skating for three hours all due to the incessant begging of the son - she says 'Really?' and in her voice I can see the unimpressed face she's making.

At dinner, about a month ago, she asks him - out of the blue- if he plays hockey because he likes it or plays because he has too. (The answer was: 'Because I like it') Of course, there are days that he doesn't want to go to practice or get up at 5:00 a.m. but he does and hardly complains. We ususally let him skip the weekly, optional skills clinic because it's on a Monday and after a weekend of hockey and going back to school we feel it might be too much.

My mother in-law always asks him about his games/goals/plays and listens intently as he tells about the deke this and the assist that. My father in law sort of listens and since it isn't about my nephew, tunes him out quickly (that's a WHOLE 'nother story). They've come to a game or two. But that's my husband's issue and since this isn't his blog, well then he get's no blogspace today.

Today is one of the last games of the season. About a month ago the parents made some noise about trying to come to one of his games, but it was so far away... (about 45 minutes) so I suggested that they come to one at a closer rink (about 20 minutes) and was told, by my mom, that she doesn't get up before 8 on the weekends. Now, this from someone who will get up at 5:00 a.m. to make the three hour drive to Maine for the day.

I have never officially invited them to a game. I feel, that being adults and grandparents, they can certainly just ask when a game is and show up if they feel inclined. My son wants them to come. I want them to too, but I feel like I might be trying to prove to them that he really does love it, so then the stubborn side of me says F*ck them, I don't need to prove anything- why do I care what they think of this whole hockey thing. But I don't want this to be at the expense of my son wanting them to come.

I have to qualify by saying that I'm pretty close with my parents (mom and stepdad) and while we've got a few issues (this being one and the property we own in Maine being the other) we get along well.

GAH! So much venting. So much indecision. Do I invite or ignore? Must go fold clothes. Thanks for listening. Again.